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baby, we were meant for each other

the title of this post makes me so happy. not only because it is a good sentiment, but it is also the title of a fantastic book i just read by scott simon (of npr fame). the subtitle? in praise of adoption. it is basically all about adoption, and the beautiful workings of love to overcome wounds. pretty amazing. you can read an excerpt here.

lots of bad stuff has happened in the past week. probably because i wrote about laying down my anxieties on our little somalia blog. now, i have even more things to be anxious about. yesterday was the last straw and i had to tell krispin that i was done with taking things well. yesterday afternoon i just decided to respond poorly to everything, and i had a pretty good time. mostly that meant abandoning krispin to deal with ms. cranky pants and reading the aforementioned book in my room with a record playing in the background. i got to think my despondent and vengeful thoughts all to myself, and then i was better.

we had a colic scare this past week. from around 5-8 or 9 ish every night ramona would be rather depressed, and show it through crying unless you jiggled her in a very specific way. specifically, on her side, swaddled, with your hand cradling her head and keeping her mouth plugged with a pacifier (read the happiest baby on the block. a true life saver!). although i am thrilled that this stops the crying, it can be hard for anyone to do this longer than 10 minutes, much less three hours. there are two nights of the week when i am by myself with the ramona baby, and let me just say that it makes me appreciate single parents so, so much. how do you do it? you ask for help, i guess.

my family is awesome, and has done such a good job of helping me out.

now, ramona doesn’t seem to need the 3 hours of jiggling, only intermittent spurts here and there. and she slept for 6 hours straight two nights in a row! don’t worry, i am not expecting this to be the norm. but i am so grateful (and well rested) for the time being.

also: she smiles! not very much and sometimes when she is angry, but still–i am taking them. she seems to be waking up more and taking pleasure in the company of others. she is great at making upset faces.

every day is something new. i think i am only just starting to realize that it is going to be this way for the rest of my life.


totally smizing.




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